


Here For You

by space_junk



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Anxiety, Anxious Reader, F/F, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Reader Is Not Chara (Undertale), Reader Is Not Frisk (Undertale), Self Harm, Swap!Sans - Freeform, Underswap Sans, mentions of self harm, other means, reader is just tired and sad, sans just wants to help, self harm isn't cutting, self harm/self mutilation, there isn't enough blueberry and reader, underswap - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-17
Updated: 2018-09-17
Packaged: 2019-07-13 12:35:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,530
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16018055
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/space_junk/pseuds/space_junk
Summary: You have a very rough, very shitty day.  So when you come home you do the only thing you can think of to do.





	Here For You

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this after having a bit of an episode today myself to forgive me if it's a little rough or unrelatable in some way  
> I just wanted a hug and Swap!Sans seems like he'd be the best candidate for that sort of thing
> 
> Enjoy!

You drag your feet into yours and the brothers’ apartment and try your best not to slam the door behind you. It’s late and you don’t want to wake anyone up, though you grumble to yourself from the rain and how soaked your clothes had become.

Not that it would surprise you if Papyrus was awake at this hour, he usually took advantage of the times his brother would be occupied or asleep to have one of his smoke breaks, not that you particularly approved of them either.

When you check to make sure tonight isn’t one of those nights, you sigh heavily and run your hand through your hair. To say that you had a rough day would be the understatement of the year.

You barely slept a wink last night because of how windy it was outside and how much it beat and shook your window, you messed up a few times at work and got in trouble which resulting in getting yelled at by your boss, and when you arrived at school later that day you found that someone broke into your locker in the art studios and stole the painting you were working on so you had to stay even later to remake the whole thing and start over- which was why you were home so late in the first place.

You bite your lip in frustration and move to sit down on the couch with your head in your hands.

Work was rough already as it is with your schedule, you’d fallen behind, and you were becoming the target for any screwups that occurred when you worked as well. And that painting had taken you weeks so far, and because some asshole deemed it fit to break into your locker and steal it of all things, you even had to rebuild the canvas, a step that you always hated, those loud nail guns and big saws that reminded you of…

Of… Times like this… When you’d…

You take a shaky breath and stand up, albeit wobbly. Using your hand to steady yourself, you make your way towards the bathroom down the hall. You don’t even notice the wet footprints your soaked boots leave behind as you breathe heavily.

You pass by both the brothers’ rooms in a daze, and you vaguely notice the sound of Papyrus muttering in his sleep and Sans snoring somewhat loudly.

Sans. Everything he does is loud somehow. But it’s also warm in its own way, his deep voice regardless of volume always makes you feel safe somehow.

But he’s not here right now. He’s not here to talk you down from where your mind is taking you, not that he knows you do this. You didn’t have the heart to tell him, you were afraid he’d be disgusted with you, and that deep and warming voice would no longer feel secure to you.

You feel your heart slamming in your chest, both out of anticipation and fear. Your face feels cold and wet. When did start crying?

When you reach the bathroom you shut the door behind you, accidentally a little loud but your mind is too hazy right now to care.

You lean against the shut door and slowly slide down until you’re sitting on the floor, gripping your arms tightly, your nails digging in strongly enough to almost do the job for you.

You carefully- and shakily- remove your hands and grab onto the smallest towel you can reach in your dazed state.

It’s more common and known for people to cut themselves, or pull out their own hair. However, one of the few things about yourself you would never forsake is your hair, and despite everything you’re afraid of blades and knives and refuse to handle them.

No, instead of that, you take this towel and press it against your forearm, and run it back and forth as roughly as you can until the skin is rubbed raw or bleeding, or both, whenever you decide to stop.

This time you stop when your hand becomes too shaky, the spot you rubbed is hot from the pressure and the formerly white towel comes away with several red stains.

You release a long, shaky breath that breaks off into a sob.

So many things are happening, too many things, you don’t know how to catch up with it all and it’s so much. You don’t think you hate yourself but sometimes you’re not so sure. Maybe it’s just a rough day, but you feel you have too many of those so you throw the thought away.

You grit your teeth and bite your lip, another sob racking your body as you pick a new spot on the same forearm and continue.

You hate the part of you that desperately wants this, but it’s the way you know to lighten the burdens you have to deal with to gain some semblance of yourself before you lose it on some innocent bystander instead of yourself.

You’re about to move to your other arm when you hear a faint knock on the door and you feel yourself freeze in fear.

“PAPY? Y/N? ARE YOU IN THERE?” Shit. Shit. Sans is knocking on the door, he sounds a little groggy but sounds more alert as time goes on. “I HEARD A NOISE, IS EVERYTHING OKAY IN THERE?”

“U-Uh…,” You try to confirm, to make him leave to you can continue, but your voices sticks in your throat. You’re so afraid, afraid of what happens next, your mind is clouded with fear. “S…Sans, I um…” Your voice comes out as barely a whisper.

You hear Sans grumble to himself, his feet shifting from what you can see under the door.

“Y-Y/N? I’M GETTING WORRIED SO I’M COMING IN, OKAY?” Your breath hitches as he shifts again.

No no no. Not like this. _Please._

You scramble on the floor to turn to the door and try to lock it. “S-S-Sans wait! Please, I-”

But you’re too late. As your shaky hands finally reach the lock, the doorknob is already moving away from you. You yelp in surprise as you no longer have anything to lean on and fall forward, your arms painfully colliding with his pajama-covered legs, your face at his bony feet.

“Y-Y/N? OH NO ARE YOU OKAY? I’M SORRY, I-” Sans’ words die in his nonexistent throat as he knelt down to help you, finally taking in your current state.

Two dark angry red, somewhat bleeding splotches on your arm, your shaky form with a blood-stained towel in your hand, and your pale, hazy and tear-stricken face.

“S…Sans, I,” You breathe, scrambling up clumsily to sit up again at his level. “I-It’s not what it looks like. I-I-”

“THEN… WHAT IS IT?”

Your words leave you as you try to come up with an excuse. Sans’ usually bright, blue-starred eyelights are sharpened with concern, now only faint blue circles in stead of his stars that you loved to look at so much.

You were the reason they went away this time.

Anything you could’ve said before thinking that was gone. You feel your eyes begin to water again and you hear Sans gasp.

“Y-Y/N! DON’T WORRY! IT’S GOING TO BE OKAY,” He says, fear in his eyelights as he looks at your arm. His hands that were reaching out to you stiffen and freeze. His eye sockets widen and he turns his head quickly. “P-PAPY! WAKE UP, Y/N, THEY’RE… They’re hurt,” He turns back to you with tears threatening to fall and your hearts breaks all over again. “They’re…. You’re… I-I couldn’t…”

“I-I ca…” Your words are gone, you’d don’t know what you can say anymore, as Sans’ face breaks down more and more, probably as he thinks about what this is.

Anything else is lost as the familiar flash of orange from Papyrus’ hoodie comes into view.

“bro, i heard you call, what happened to-” Another gasp as he sees you two on the floor and takes in the scene before him. “….stars, kid.”

In the midst of everything, your breathing became panicked and erratic, afraid of what could possibly happen next. Unconsciously, you feel your hand with the bloody towel raise towards your arm, but a bony hand catches you.

“stop it, kid. please…” Papyrus’ already tired eyes look down at you even more exhausted somehow, his grip never loosening as he looks between you and Sans sobbing on the floor.

“let’s get you cleaned up.”

\---------------------------------

“Pap, I…”

“don’t say anything,” Papyrus keeps a stern eye on you as he hovers while Sans is attempting to heal your wounded arm. “we need my bro to be able to focus.”

Well, Papyrus’ word is law in this house. You learned that quickly when you put his honey in a different cabinet after grocery shopping one day. He needed his organization.

It took some time, but you all managed to calm down enough to get off the bathroom floor and into the kitchen, each of you seated at the table. You were still tense, however, as you were so scared of the brothers finding out about this part of you that now you didn’t know what to do with yourself.

Sans actually slapped your hand away when you tried to mess with your arm out of nervousness. It surprised you more than anything, but his upset expression froze you.

A few minutes pass and your arm doesn’t feel hot with pain anymore, it’s of a dull ache now. Sans sighs and takes some bandages off the table and starts to wrap up your arm.

“I AT LEAST STOPPED THE BLEEDING AND SOME IRRITATION, BUT IT’S STILL HEALING SO WE NEED TO WRAP THEM UP,” He says as he carefully finishes bandaging you. “Y/N… WHAT HAPPENED?”

It makes sense that’s the first question on their minds, you think as Papyrus nods along.

You try to take a deep breath, but fail as it scratches off into a cough before stuttering out completely.

“P…Please don’t… Kick me out.” Your eyes are already watering again as the brothers’ eye sockets widen.

“y/n, why would we do that? you haven’t done anything wrong. you mean because you hurt yourself?” You and Sans flinch as he says that, but you keep your eyes on him. “lemme tell you kid, you aren’t going anywhere. were you afraid to tell us this? cause of that? i know we don’t have organs but you’re breakin’ my heart here, y/n.”

Papyrus tries to lighten the mood, and you appreciate that, even Sans gives a light chuckle in response and you crack the faintest of smiles. Papyrus grins at that and ruffles your hair.

“I-I’m sorry I… I was scared to tell you guys a-and I…,” You swallow, willing yourself to keep going. You almost feel yourself brighten a little when Sans places his hand over yours in reassurance, squeezing tightly. “I-I’ve done this for… A long time. I had a rough day at work today and some… Some jerk stole my work at school, and I was just… So tired, so I-”

“Y/N.”

Sans’ voice cuts you off but you’re fine with that, because he’d been quiet for a while. It was making your nervous.

“S-Sans?”

“If… YOU WERE HURTING, YOU SHOULD’VE COME TO US FIRST,” He says sadly and you wince. “I KNOW IT ISN’T THAT EASY, BUT YOU KNOW NOW THAT YOU CAN. I’LL WAKE UP IF IT’S LATE, I’LL FIND YOU IF YOU CALL, I WILL BE THERE FOR YOU, Y/N.”

By the end, even Papyrus’ eye sockets widen in surprise like he was hearing something meant privately, and you’re positive that your warm face is no mistake either.

“S-Sans, I-” He squeezes your hand again, as if warning you. You smile softly and turn your gaze down to your hands. “Thank you. I… It means a lot.”

You feel Papyrus’ eyes on you two sighs lightly, resting his arm on your head.

“welp, don’t know about you guys, but i'm _bone_ tired, nyeh,” He stands up again and smiles at you. “glad you’re okay kid. don’t scare us like that again though, alright?”

You nod. “Right, heh. Sorry Paps.”

He shakes his head and rests a hand on Sans’ shoulder for a moment before walking away.

“stop apologizin’. Night you two lovebones.”

Before either of you can protest, he’s long gone.

“P-PAPY!”

You just hear z’s coming from his room as a response and you can’t help but let yourself giggle slightly. The brothers always knew how to make you laugh, even if it was at your expense.

“H-HONESTLY, THAT BAG OF BONES.” Sans pause and grumbles to himself, making you laugh a little harder. Sans can’t help but follow along for a few moments. He scoots a little closer to you.

“Y/N,” He starts as you’ve calmed down. You feel his hand carefully graze your arm over the fresh bandages, lightly enough that it doesn’t hurt. “I-I WAS SERIOUS BEFORE. OKAY? PROMISE ME YOU’LL CONTACT ME IF YOU’RE IN TROUBLE, OR PAPY IF I DON’T RESPOND.”

Your eyes soften as you move your arm under his hand to intertwine your fingers with his phalanges. Blue crosses his face but his eyelights stand firm.

“I promise, thank you Sans. I… I’m glad you found me,” You scoot a little closer to him as well. Both of your legs are touching, his spread out a bit so they’re touching the outside of yours. You move your free hand to his shoulder. “I’m glad you stopped me.”

His grin softens at your words and he raises his own boney hand to your cheek, leaning in slightly.

“I’m always here for you, y/n,” His voice is soft, but the usually deep tone of it is somehow deeper because of it, and it makes you shiver anxiously. “You… You know I-I always…”

His words fade away as you lean in return, moving your hand behind his head and bringing him closer to you as you softly kiss him on the teeth. He leans further in turn and you feel a tingle on your lips.

After a moment you pull away with a soft grin on your face.

“Me too.”

The stars return to his eyelights and you couldn’t be happier to see them again.

“G-GOOD, I’M GLAD,” His excitable tone is back as well. “JUST KNOW IF YOU’RE EVER IN TROUBLE- OR NOT, REGARDLESS- THE MAGNIFICENT SANS WILL ALWAYS BE HERE! MWEH-HEH-HEH!!”

You giggle in response and carefully stand up. The use of Sans’ healing magic always left you somewhat dizzy.

“Thank you boneboy,” You smile and kiss his forehead and he laughs merrily. “Now… I don’t know about you, but I don’t think I could get to sleep now if I tried. Would you be up for another ‘Cooking With the Magnificent Sans’ session? I missed ours last week.”

His star eyelights somehow get bigger.

“OF COURSE! THE MAGNIFICENT SANS ALWAYS HAS TIME FOR A COOKING LESSON WITH Y/N! IT COULD EVEN BE OUR FIRST DATE AS FRESH COUPLE WE’VE BECOME! MWEH-HEH-HEH!!”

“My thoughts exactly.”


End file.
